Details in Dying by Logan Mock-Bunting
Aurora photographer Logan Mock-Bunting spent five years documenting his mother’s journey with lung cancer. He wrote this about his work:
Mom called me a few years ago and asked me to come over – she specifically told me to bring my camera. I’d been a photojournalist for about five years, and she loved talking to me about story ideas, so I figured it was simply another idea, or maybe a pretty flower in the garden.
Instead, that afternoon she told my me and my father that she had a tumor in her lung. She asked if I wanted to photograph her journey. She didn’t want to call it a battle or a fight – those words were too violent for her. She considered it a journey because she wanted to survive, as well as embrace the joy of life with what time she had.
And so we began a project together. The next five years we spent documenting her life, loves, and ultimately her passing.
Sometimes it was very difficult to hit the shutter when it felt like I should be more in the “son” role than the “observer” role. Many times I didn’t make a photo because it didn’t feel right. Sometimes the only way I got through situations was being able to put the camera over my face like a mask, look through the barrier and think about light and composition instead of what was going on to my family around me. It ran the spectrum.
People ask how I had time to do this. I made the time. I made it a priority to be with Mom and Dad. I have just recently started to shift away from my hometown (I’m now working in Washington DC) but that wasn’t an option for me when Mom was sick – I wasn’t going to move away. It was not easy and it meant lots of driving to doctors appointments, lots of sitting, waiting and crying. But it was something I had to do.
Why did I make these photographs? What else was I going to do? I was physically helping my family as much as I could. I was emotionally doing all I could for them. There is still an amazing sense of helplessness when you are watching a family member die from within. Photography was a way to literally organize things: to process them, and have a little control over something. It was a therapy, a guard, a protection and a mission. When everything else is up in the air, it can be nice to have an purpose to guide your next action. I would love it if this work could help someone else get through the mourning process, or help someone feel less isolated by sharing the experience.
Logan is now making these photographs into a book. The project, called Details in Dying, will be “given to Hospices and Bereavement centers in the hope that others suffering through a major loss might possibly benefit through seeing a shared experience.” Logan has put out a personal appeal for funding for the book project. Contributions will be used in the book’s layout, design, image editing, printing and delivery.
If you’d like to contribute to the publication of Details in Dying, visit Logan Mock-Bunting’s Kickstarter page.
To see more work by Logan Mock-Bunting, visit Aurora Photos.
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